


Day 12, Day 15

by takemedowntown



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Deep Conversations, Emotional, Fluff and Humor, Love, M/M, Post 9X6, early in their sentence, prison boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-04-11 12:31:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19109719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/takemedowntown/pseuds/takemedowntown
Summary: ian and mickey discuss what took place foreach of them after saying goodbye at the border  emotional as hell and probably cheesy but oh well. this is how I pictured them talking about these tricky topics. hope you enjoy!





	Day 12, Day 15

Day 12 

It was almost the two week mark of Ian being in lock-up; almost two weeks since he had been reunited with Mickey...and things were going surprisingly well. 

Prison isn’t so bad when you’re getting laid by the love of your life on a nightly basis.

The first week was an adjustment, more so for Ian than Mickey who was pretty familiar with the goings. On the other hand this was completely new territory for Ian. A whole new routine; a whole new way of life. Some days were worse than others but having his badass boyfriend with him through it all made everything exponentially better. The hopelessness didn’t feel nearly as deep and the sentence didn’t feel quite as long when he looked at Mickey. Can your guardian angel and your soulmate be the same person? 

Naturally, they bickered. It was their way. They had so much baggage to unpack from their past, some of it from years ago that they never had the time or stability to address. One of the most confusing was the spectacle of Gay Jesus.

“So...how did that start? Like no offense Ian, but what the fuck?” Mickey attempted to be sensitive, knowing that this entire debacle had to be the culmination of a whole lot of mental turmoil. But he refused to assume by asking right off the bat if he was off his meds. He wanted to let Ian tell his story instead of trying to write it for him.

“It was so innocent in the beginning. It felt like I was just doing my part for the struggling gay youth you know? Through it all I had you in the back of my mind...the shit you went through just so you could be who you are.” At this, Ian noticed Mickey begin to squirm uncomfortably where he sat on the opposite side of the bed at the subtle mention of their biggest shared traumas. The horrors of Terry, the brutal introduction of Svetlana, the birth of yevgeny. 

Ian reaches across and grabs his face, smacking a quick but passionate kiss to his lips, wanting to erase all of the heartache of bad memories for a second. From the small smile Mickey gives him, it seems to have worked.

“Anyway..it was really good for me at first. It gave me a sense a purpose. But it got overwhelming really fast and it became like this...fucking cult following. It was insane. It’s sounds so dumb but I held so much power and influence over all these kids and while it was all under good intentions, it ended so badly. By that point it wasn’t even about queer rights, I was just caught up in the whirlwind and manic out of my goddamn mind. I was doing and saying all of this crazy shit that didn’t make sense but felt right in the moment? Thinking about it now feels like an out of body experience, like that couldn’t have been me. But it was. It IS.” Ian finished his emotional ramblings with a shaky sigh.

“Wow. Holy shit Ian. I knew it got crazy...I saw the news coverage. But fuck. I’m so sorry.” Mickey says quietly while reaching out to caress Ian’s shoulder.

“Don’t be. It was all me. I deserve to be in here.” Ian replied quietly trying to remain stoic.

“You are not your fucking bipolar. You are the guy who is selfless enough to mentor young struggling queer kids and brave enough to stand up for them in the homophobic shitstorm that is southside Chicago. Your bipolar caused all of the other shit. That wasn’t you. You’re good Ian.” Mickey finishes softly with a look of pure admiration in his eyes.

Ian breathed in as he absorbed his words. How such a genuinely caring and amazing man came from Terry fucking Milkovich was beyond him. This was HIS man.

“I almost believe it when you say it.” Ian said with a sheepish grin.

“Shut the fuck up.” 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

 

Day 15

A few days passed and then it was Mickey’s turn. Ian knew that bringing up his time in Mexico would be painful for them both, but he needed to know. He needed to know if Mickey was safe and why he went through everything he did to come back.

“So, working for the cartel. Was that the plan all along?” Ian was genuinely curious.

“Look, I don’t wanna be a dick here and bring this up again, but things...changed when you didn’t end up coming with me. The dreams I had when I was locked up last time, they weren’t the same.” Mickey tried to be as gentle as possible, because he knows deep down that Ian didn’t make that decision lightly.

Ian took a deep breath and looked down quickly at his hands as if they were suddenly interesting. He couldn’t cry. This wasn’t about him. “I- I understand. Can you tell me what happened...after?” 

Mickey took a big breath. He wasn’t sure how the fuck he was going to explain this.   
“Me crossing that border didn’t mean that I was magically no longer southside scum. I went through the money you gave me pretty fast trying to keep a roof over my head and food in my fuckin belly. Working for the cartel, it was the easy option. Easier than trying to find something legal and legit. And it was fine for awhile, I knew the business and how to protect myself. But I was always looking over my shoulder.” At this Mickey’s voice grew louder and shakier with emotion as he continued. “...Like I have been my whole goddamn life, waiting for the one good thing I’ve got going to be taken. Like with fucking Terry. I didn’t want to come out because I was scared shitless of him, but mostly because I was terrified that you’d be taken from me. The one thing I had. And I didn’t want the good thing I had going in Mexico to be taken from me. But that’s when I realized, the fear was never fucking going away. The looking over my shoulder. I was always so fucking paranoid, everywhere I went. Thats when I knew, if I was ever going to have a life worth living, I needed to be completely free. And that’s what I’m doing, that’s why I’m here. That’s why I’m here with you.” Mickey ends his confessional with a loud huff, sounding almost annoyed with his own honesty. 

When he finally looks up to gaze at Ian; he almost shits himself. The man is confounded by his own tears.

“Holy shit you’re embarrassing.” Mickey barely gets out before he bursts into laughter. 

He is immediately met with a hard shove from Ian. “Shut the fuck up! That was the most beautiful thing I have ever heard in my entire fucking life. Who even are you?” Ian laughs along as he wipes his own admittedly embarrassing tears.

“I figure that I’ve always been a lameass sap on the inside but I’m just now allowing it to come to fruition. But don’t get excited it will only happen on special occasions.” Mickey continues to tease and make light out of the intense feelings that just poured out of him so naturally that he feels disturbed.

“Like when you propose?” Ian teases right back. 

“HA. You trying to wife me up Gallagher?” 

“You fucking know I am.” Ian’s expression and tone turns serious and gazes Mickey directly in his eyes.

Mickey; entering panic mode at the sudden shift in mood, reacts by immediately turning red and looking away while laughing sheepishly.

“Shut the fuck up ma-“. 

Mickey doesn’t get to finish because then he’s being tossed on the bed on his back and instantly covered by his ginger boyfriend. Who is still fucking staring at him with this goddamn LOOK.

“You fucking know I am.” He repeats, determined to make Mickey know just how serious he feels about him.

Mickey is fresh out of coherent thought at this point and just decides that his best bet is to just lurch up and slam his mouth against Ian’s to get him to shut up for awhile. It works.

Then he does get to finish.

**Author's Note:**

> we’re getting gallavich back soon :)


End file.
